New Divide

What up peeps. Got nothing majorly new really, but thought I'd better write something anyway. Maybe something will come through, who knows.

The job search got boring and tedious quickly. I kind of bailed after only two days... and those two days consisted of about 15 minutes of actual searching per day... maybe I don't deserve a job. Ah well. Such is life. Hopefully I pick up the game or some pieces just fall into place with little effort from me, cos lord knows, I can be one lazy git.


 

I've also decided to adopt a new 'format' for my blog posts. A lot of blogs out there that I like to read follow a template almost, or adopt some form of continuity in its structure, such as the way a blogger signs off, or in the post title etc. I've decided to have all of my posts be either band names, song names, album names or lyrics, and list at least one of those as the title and have it relevant to the post's content. And at the end, I'll sign off with the name of the song/band etc and link it to a vid of said song. Should be something different I hope, and I also hope it adds a bit of structure/awesomeness to my posts.

Anyway, now for some actual bloggish content. Looks like I found something to write about after all, yay me.

Don't you hate when you're pissed off/frustrated and you don't even know why? I sure as hell do. Like yesterday, I was snippy at my parents for no reason I could discern. Even when I was responding back in a heavily cheesed off matter, in my head I was thinking "Why the hell am I so pissed? They didn't do anything wrong." I guess I'm like that at times. I can be calm as anything one minute, cheesed off like a badly-made cheesecake the next. I can stay calm in situations where most other people would freak out, and yet I can blow up at tiny things. I'm a bit of a grey line I guess, which, at most times, I like. I can see both sides of things, or from all perspectives. It gives me a very unique viewpoint compared to most people and it can be very advantageous I have to say. Then again it means I'm also weighed down by the negative where other people wouldn't be, so it does have its drawbacks I guess. 

I'm overall very well balanced, truth be told. I took an online questionnaire thing (and we all know the internet never lies and every quiz out there is certified at a scientific level) from a  reliable source thingy, so it was relatively legit. Anyway, the quiz was for 'Which side of your brain do you use most?' or something like that. Where one side of the brain is analytical and logical, and the other side is creative. Or something. I'm no neuroscientist or whatever the hell those peeps are, so don't quote me on that, but whatever.  Guess what I got. Yep, I was 'ruled by both', or, I was even for both the left and right sides of my brain. Which meant I could draw from both sides and come up with unique solutions to problems, see things differently etc. And this is apparently relatively rare. I was proud of that result. There was the downside though, of having both sides 'war for control' over the other, resulting in me sometimes being 'crippled by indecision'. There's always a downside I guess. But overall, I like the fact that I utilise both sides of my brain-nugget.

I also took another quiz (also certified...) which tells you what colour or 'aura' you are. And what did I get? The undefined one, or the one who can draw from all colours/emotions. So again, a bit of a grey line, being a bit of everything and resulting in some mad-haxed super-colour. Awesome.

Now obviously yes, this 'quiz' wasn't as pro-ish as the other one, but these two quizzes coupled with numerous other experiences and situations in my life have lead me to believe that yes, I am a bit of a grey line. And I really do like that. It is, in fact, rather awesome.

Anyway, back to why I was feeling pissed. I think it may have been from some mildish form of, dare I say it, depression. 'Of what?' you may ask, to which I would respond "I honestly don't know." I do have an idea though. I think it's the fact that I'm 22 and yet don' really have anything to show for it. No real 'signs' I guess of growing, of maturing, of getting older, of living my life. Except for probably my car. Which I am devilishly proud of, I LOVE that thing. Bought and paid for all by myself. And that means a lot to me, to be able to look at it and say 'That beastly piece of machinery and epic awesomeness is mine, all mine, and no one can say any different." But apart from that, I live at home still, don't have a full time job, don't have a massive, outgoing social life and don't have a special lady friend which to me, is the kicker. There may be some movement on that front, but as it stands now, nothing concrete. If that were to change, my life would be looking up.

Anyway, like I said, I'm pretty tempermental. So I feel weird today (and yesterday) but tomorrow, I could be feeling pretty damn good. I have to say, putting this all into writing definitely helps. 

That's all for now I guess.

New Divide 
Linkin Park
Minutes To Midnight, 2007